Monday, August 03, 2015

Exercise (Ugh): Success and Failure

I went to the Y today! Put in my Groupon, got myself set, and went swimming. All of 20 minutes, which included rests as needed, but I'm okay with that amount of time; while I wanted to make it long enough to be worth going, I also don't want to hurt so much tomorrow that I never go again. I count this as success.

It may come as no surprise that I haven't been exercising much at all lately. I haven't been writing about it, have I? In fact, I stopped riding the bike regularly before I was laid off, around when I had the doctor's appointment (the yes-I've-been-exercising, yes-I-know-I've-gained-weight appointment, which was actually about my blood pressure medicine but anyway). And while I've tried walking more, my feet are so stupidly tender that this almost always leaves me with blisters, or at the least soreness, no matter what the footwear or how short the distances.

I know I mentioned that I was getting a new bike seat, in hopes that it would be less uncomfortable so I would be able to ride for more than ten minutes at a time. I don't know if I mentioned that just ordering one was a hurdle, since there are so many different kinds with different features, and I swear that Every Single One has 10 reviews on Amazon saying that it is The Best Ever, and that the rider was immediately able to ride for hundreds of miles at a stretch with it, and 10 other reviews stating that it is Worthless, Useless, Put Them in the Hospital, and Ruined Their Lives Forever. I basically picked one by stabbing blindfolded at the screen.

And then I mentioned that I got it on the bike, but not properly. And that I couldn't deal. And I haven't been able to since. Just thinking of it makes this feeling of failure wash over me, a combination of being unhandy enough that I can't deal with the technical aspect, and un-whatever enough about not liking exercise, not being able to find one that works for me ... Rationally, I know that having problems with the bike seat, or with biking, are not exactly a failure, but that's how it feels. Everything says that exercise works best if you can find a method you enjoy, and I wish I could! I just read a book from the library, Secrets From the Eating Lab, which wasn't bad if not exactly shocking news (diets don't work, whoa, really?), and while it also said that about finding exercise you like, what really cast me down was the start of that chapter.
"...all sorts of perks" from exercising, eh? How about none of those? It's depressing.

I was hoping that writing about it would make it feel better, but it hasn't. Maybe the swimming will help. It's worth a short-term try, anyway.

2 comments:

  1. Why don't you go to a sport shop in your area and try different bike seats on different exercise bikes? Tell the clerk you are shopping for a new bike seat but you have no idea how to properly install one and are really shopping for a seat and are willing to pay someone to come out and install it. Arrange to have a neighbor and/or friend visiting when the appointment is scheduled. If you get to try the seat before it's purchased and then it's properly installed (to fit you and to be secured to the bike) it might turn out better.

    We won't talk about the fact I haven't been to the health center for 8 months, ok?

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  2. Even when I was young, slim, and healthy exercise never gave me those benefits either. I was always exhausted and sleepy after. It may have had something to do with the fact that I was also dealing with a mild heart condition (unknown to me at the time) but the fact remains I have never felt the energy boost so often ascribed to exercise.

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