I can not tell you how absolutely livid I am that it was the right decision to not clear out the little bin of period supplies in the closet.
Yes, I got my fucking period. Again. I am fifty-seven years old! This bullshit should have been over and done years ago! I'm on hormone therapy! Shut this damned system DOWN!
At least, when I was at the grocery store last weekend, I noticed that Ben & Jerry's was buy-one-get-one free, so I have ice cream* in the house. Although, side gripe, I thought I'd try the Coffee Toffee Bar Crunch again, which I stopped getting because it was never as good as Coffee Heath Bar Crunch used to be, and wow I will never get that again. I did finish it, it's still good ice cream, but there was hardly any toffee, and the coffee flavor was there but so wimpy. More like someone with a cup of espresso walked past the ice cream maker while it was running than that it was added to the mix. Deeply unimpressed. I'm going to go to Coldstone Creamery this weekend and get the good stuff.
*We have plenty of other treats in the house, but for some reason ice cream is what I want in this situation. I used to call Ben & Jerry's my three-dollar therapy, if you were wondering how long ago that started.
Anyway, back to the main gripe: fucking period. I feel cruddy and "off" and just generally annoyed. And if the gynecologist wants to do another tissue biopsy, I may get the costly painkillers this time, because that hurt so much I still flinch to think about it. Or if she wants to do something else, I will ask her about the expected pain level relative to that, because that was the absolute limit of what I can take. I am a wimp, or as I like to tell friends, "I am a delicate flower." (One of my friends likes the phrase so much she uses it about herself now.)
In another FFS moment that probably isn't related, I've started to get leg cramps, specifically at night or in the early hours of the morning. I'll turn over in bed and something in one or the other lower leg (or both! once it was both) goes from startled what-was-that twang to really agonizing pain in very short order. Pointing and/or flexing the toes doesn't reliably help; what helps is trying to massage the muscles, though doing that without setting the other leg off isn't always possible. It's been joyful, as you can imagine. What a way to wake up. I understand that potassium can help with that, and the internet tells me bananas and orange juice both have it, so I'm going to try to get back in the daily smoothie habit. Please let it help!
In a final moment of optimism, I will be happy to have Monday off work.
Feeling cruddy wasn't in my plans for the weekend, but hopefully I won't feel this way the whole time.
Do you have a long weekend? Any plans, or just gleeful sloth?
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