Head, Heat, Christmas ... Let me sum up

Ooh, this morning's chocolate was Marblehead Mints, my first Harbor Sweets love. Possibly still my very favorite, though if I was offered the choice between a Marblehead Mint and a Sweet Sloop, I'd dither. Love them both! Mmm, mint ... yum, toffee.

Plus, a snowman!


I think I like the overall look of this calendar slightly more...


but the individual details of the first one one are really fun.

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Just at this moment, no headache. Well, that faint, ever-so-slight disturbance that lies at that precarious point between euphoria and worry. My head doesn't hurt! Doesn't hurt! ... Is it about to? No, it's fine. In fact, it doesn't hurt! Doesn't hurt! Wait. Shit, was that a twinge? Yes. No? It's starting to hurt again. Maybe? Should I take something? Hmmm.

The good news is that it was a bit more so this afternoon, and is less so now. (Unlike yesterday, when it was moderately annoying during the day, and got truly horrible while I was driving home. That was nice.) (Not.) (My stomach is still kind of unhappy tonight, though, an unfortunate side effect of the headaches. Something bland for dinner.) (Enough parentheses!) I was able to run errands on the way home, not just gas for the car (because toying with running out is just less entertaining in winter*) (oops), but also Petsmart and Target.

*Baby, it's cold outside! I'm trying not to complain too much, since you don't have to shovel cold, but urgh.

It's so odd to go to Target right before Christmas and only need everyday things like tissues and batteries. I felt like I ought to be buying red-and-green things. But hey, I got what I needed, and I can cross the trip off the to-do list. I love crossing items off the list.

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There's a wall clock near my desk at work whose battery apparently died over the weekend. All day yesterday, it claimed the time was 9:40, but as of this morning, it was stuck at 5:20. Interesting.

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Question of the day: Do winds at 20mph feel that much stronger than winds at 17mph? Today's forecast was Windy, while tomorrow's isn't. I can't imagine that it feels that different...what do you think?

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I would never call myself any kind of expert in how heating systems should work, but here's something that I think I am correct in saying: they should not be running every minute of the day. They should turn off some of the time. Yes?

If the thermostat is set at 70, say, the heating system should, step one, blow warm/hot air until the temperature reaches 70, and then, step two, the blower should turn off. Once the temperature drops a certain amount below 70, step three, the heater should switch back on and blow warm/hot air again. Actually, step three is step one again, right? On, off.

Does that sound about right to you?

What it should NOT be doing, in my totally inexpert opinion, is replacing "step two, and then the blower should turn off" with "step two, and then the blower should start blowing cool air". And yet, this is what happens at work. Blower=on. Never* off.

*Not actually, literally never. Why, the main blower-on-my-head** turned off this morning, for the fourth time since I started seven weeks ago. (It was off for more than ten minutes; the peace was wonderful.) So not never-never, but for a statistically-insignificant amount of time.
**Because of course there isn't just one blower pointed at my desk, oh no.

Which would bug me in a far more theoretical way if the blower didn't blow that cool air down directly onto my head. (My poor oversensitive and headache-prone head.)

And how do I handle the onslaught? Oh, not well.

• I put on a hat, a cowl, a hood, or a scarf. It's a little silly-looking. Not the most professional image.
  
• I imagine wearing a visor, or one of those umbrellas you wear on your head. (I KNOW it would look beyond ridiculous, but I almost don't care.)
• I brainstorm how to put a top on my cube. Tricky. I can't just put a layer of something across the top, because I'm a little taller than the walls, so I wouldn't be able to stand up straight. Maybe umbrellas? But attached how?
  
• My temper gets even more hair-trigger than usual (I know, scary thought). Combine the blowing with a headache, and I really have to stop myself from snapping at people for Talking! Near me! Shut up!
• Drink hot coffee. One unforeseen drawback to a good travel mug is that it keeps the warmth in so well, the outside doesn't get warm. Usually, that's a good thing, but sometimes I want to warm my hands.
  
• I fantasize about finding the thermostat and hitting the Off button. With a sledgehammer.
• When the head hurts, by grasping my head with both hands and trying not to moan out loud.
  

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At work, we've been in that period where the catalogs are almost completely done and ready to go to the printer (I think they're gone now), but not quite. This has meant not a ton of work for me to do on them, until the proofs come in and it's a few weeks of crazy. In the interim, they've got me working on another project, not strictly proofing-related. In theory this is perfectly fine with me (Better Busy Than Bored, I always say). In practice, though, this project is:

• repetitive
• boring
• repetitive
• dull
• repetitive
  

They're paying me, I keep reminding myself. Paychecks are good.

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Looking Forward To
As you know by now, I'm looking forward to December 17th, when my mother arrives in MA. I'm also looking forward to December 23rd, when we go to Grandma's, and December 25th, for obvious reasons, and December whenever-my-brother-arrives-th. But do you know the other day I'm looking forward to? Can you guess?

December 21st.

Do you know why? I think I mentioned it already this season.

Yes, the solstice. Days start getting longer and lighter again. Two more weeks!

I am still using the therapy light, by the way, every morning (though I missed one or two sessions on weekends, when I get up after sunrise and it seems less urgent). I can't say for sure that it's helping, though I am having less trouble than I was getting myself out of bed in the mornings. Still, I'm not exactly bouncing out of bed, not feeling less tired, or more energetic, or anything like that. So who really knows.

In terms of the actual brand/model light I got, I'm perfectly happy with it. It's easy to use, and I've only just gone through the first charge, so that's impressive. It's small enough not to take over the whole table, but certainly emits enough light to feel useful.

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After I got back from Florida in early November, I looked at the calendar from then to Christmas and thought, "It's going to fly by. Right now, it looks like a long time, but I'm going to blink and it will be almost here and I won't have gotten everything done." And, yup, here we are.

I'm kind of at peace with that, though. Last year, I put too much pressure on myself to be ready for all things, so I got more stressed than I needed to. This year, I'm going to let myself off the hook for perfect. Sweep up the worst of the fur-tumbleweeds, charge the air-bed-inflation-thing (pump?), clear the fridge of anything too fuzzy ... just breathe, and roll with it.

Amen.